I got a haircut this weekend. It was very very VERY much needed. It wasnt just a regular haircut though, at least not for me. . . . I saw a *stylist*. It was my first REAL haircut, not a drive through chain haircut, but a good, professional styling. It was SO exciting! A high school friend recommended her stylist to me, and I made an appointment. Ive had this date for 2 weeks. Maybe even a day or so more. . . . I scheduled this pre-moving and pre-thanksgiving. I was actually hoping to have a new 'do' for all of the holidays. Thanksgiving just missed the cut (pun not intended. . ahahaha. . . ha. . ) This lovely woman is only in West LA doing hair on the weekends, and we couldnt make a time until after turkey day, and the move. BUMMER!!!!
Suffice it to say, I was EXCITED!!! I was also, however, clueless. I have never really known what to do with my hair. I got myself a CHI straightener a while back, and loved having it straight. Curls seemed less manageable than 20 minutes with my straightening iron. Fast forward though and I have twins, and 20 minutes wasted on a straightener just isnt worth it. Actually, a lot of the things I used to do seem 'not worth' the time they take now. For the longest time, and even now at times, if I had a 'spare' 20 minutes, I wanted to SLEEP!! I used to shower twice a day - no, Im not gross, I just really enjoy bathing! There was a time where I had 5+ shower gels in my shower and almost HAD to shower multiple times just to get a chance to use all my 'stuff':) Think Bath and Body works Country Apple!!
These, and other things, have taken to the back burner since becoming a mama. I have control issues, and work daily on the fact that I can no longer accomplish most tasks in a single attempt. I struggle with having to stop suddenly to tend to a toddler or two, and at times, a husband. I believe that by nature, I am task oriented. I really enjoy taking something on and completing it, end to end. OCD? Maybe, but its the truth. . . All this being said, I just have a hard time starting things when I dont think I can complete it, or if I am unsure as to when I can be finished. So? I stopped ironing my hair. I get frustrated when the kitchen isnt cleaned up right away. I am nervous when our schedule os off kilter - this one is really pretty justified though, but I am working on it.
It came to my attention that I spent a lot of time being frustrated or planning for any hiccup that might come along. While planning can be good sense, I can get ahead of the crazy curve at times. The bottom line is that we can handle anything, including a napless day. . . sucky as it might be. (i will fight to the death for naps though. . . ) I began to think back to when I was in high school and college, and was a babysitter. I was a rockin babysitter! I had several steady families that always called my first. The first time I sat for on of these families, I put the kids to bed, and the mother called me the next morning. She wanted to know how I got her daughter, 6 or 7 at the time, to let me braid her hair! I didnt really know. . . she just let me do it. Mom was jealous but thrilled for a morning without a tangled mess on her daughters pretty little head:) We played games, watched movies, hid and sought. . it was great. Most nights, I even cleaned up after dinner and got the toys put away. Probably another reason they kept calling me back:) So, other than the obvious differences - the fact that I am the mama now, we are financially, medically, legally, etc, responsible for these kids - what changed? Why couldnt I be my kids babysitter? Be chill about all things, so long as we are SAFE. Being a mama of toddlers should be FUN, right?? Sure, there is stress involved, but come on. . . . it is fun!
I tried it out the other night. I was alone, putting the kids to bed in our new place. I was nervous at first. After all, bedtime in our old place was difficult. We never really childproofed there since we knew we were leaving it soon. There wasnt room for anything, and it just wasnt comfortable. Things are different now, both in our new home and my head. I got the kids bathed, diapered and pajama-ed. We had a little bedtime snack, brushed our teeth and had our milk. Off to bed we went. The kitchen was a mess. The toys were everywhere. Hurricane E and N had blown through. I kept myself in the babysitter mindset. Tried not to think onto the next, next thing, and just kept to the task at hand. Things got mostly cleaned up, and I watched a movie. The kids got up, thankfully, one after the other, within an hour of being out to bed. I grabbed them, finished off their milk and back to bed they went, and back to the movie I went.
What does all this have to do with my haircut? Well, aside from the fact that my hair was cut hours before this hopping evening-in, it made me feel pretty:) I spent 2 glorious hours in a stylists chair. I picked a hairstyle from a magazine and watched this brilliant artist create it on my head from a picture. She brought me coffee and a cookie - FAB! I left feeling like a million bucks and had walked in looking like not so much. . . The chill attitude and cute hair cut reminded me more of my babysitting days. Back when I slept til 1 on the weekends, or days off from school, lol. When I showered as much as I wanted, spent however long on hair, changing outfits, talking on the phone, whatever. Some of these days coincided with being my husbands girlfriend. Back then, I had time and more importantly TOOK the time to cutify myself before we would go out. A far cry from the tossed up ponytail Ive been sporting for the last many many months. . .18+ actually. We have been married almost 6 years, and together for nearly 11. Id say thats pretty impressive, especially when you toss in two moves across the country, 15 months of bedrest and 18 month old twin boys. Ya. . . definitely impressive.
As Oprah says, Ive put myself back on the list. Ive began my medical maintenance again(dentist, physical, the normal stuff), and am getting back my cute self. Ive taken in 2 hours of hair therapy and that has reached the deepest part of my mind and soul. SOOOO terrific!!!
As much as I know I need to be my kids mother and my husbands wife, its also important to relax and be my kids babysitter and my husbands girlfriend:)
Monday, November 29, 2010
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Getting Settled
I swear that at the beginning of this week, I had a ton to say. A mix of excitement, anxiety and STRESS over moving and dealing with the idiots along the way. . . now, we are nearing being settled in our new home. Amazing considering its just been a week today, we have twin toddlers, AND spent the day away from home over Thanksgiving.
The boxes are clearing, and piles for donation are sitting by the door. Its a wonderful blessing to be without storage options. As I've shared before, Im a purger and loooove getting rid of the extra and unwanted. Without a space to set things aside for those 'just in case' occasions, or because its 'good to have', we are being really forced to let go. There might be another piece or two of furniture that we need to get to hold some of the items that really DO hold some value for us, but we are still closer to be than we have been in a long while.
The best part? And it isnt even move related. . . .I got a hair cut today! A real, grown up, NON 'drive-through' hair cut. I sat in a chair for 2 hours. . . 2 glorious, ME centered hours:) As I left my lovely stylist today, I told her she needs to file with my health insurance for the therapy she had just given me:) Im thrilled, to say the least, and even B likes it. I hope he didnt react to my haircut only because he knew thats where I was while he was home with the kids. . .. I think he really likes it though:)
On to unpack? Or watch a movie with some pie. . . hmmmm. . . choices:)
The boxes are clearing, and piles for donation are sitting by the door. Its a wonderful blessing to be without storage options. As I've shared before, Im a purger and loooove getting rid of the extra and unwanted. Without a space to set things aside for those 'just in case' occasions, or because its 'good to have', we are being really forced to let go. There might be another piece or two of furniture that we need to get to hold some of the items that really DO hold some value for us, but we are still closer to be than we have been in a long while.
The best part? And it isnt even move related. . . .I got a hair cut today! A real, grown up, NON 'drive-through' hair cut. I sat in a chair for 2 hours. . . 2 glorious, ME centered hours:) As I left my lovely stylist today, I told her she needs to file with my health insurance for the therapy she had just given me:) Im thrilled, to say the least, and even B likes it. I hope he didnt react to my haircut only because he knew thats where I was while he was home with the kids. . .. I think he really likes it though:)
On to unpack? Or watch a movie with some pie. . . hmmmm. . . choices:)
Friday, November 12, 2010
Banana Raisin Muffins
http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=155&src=droid
Gonna try these when we are in the house!
Gonna try these when we are in the house!
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Crockpot Creamy Italian Chicken
My friend and her hubby loved this one!
http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=1021632
http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=1021632
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Moving! Food! and Exhaustion. . !!
Some of you know by now, we are moving! Thank goodness! When we moved into our little duplex a year ago, we knew it wouldnt be for longer than the lease term. We quickly outgrew the space and after a long and emotionally draining search, we found a great house to rent nearby! Still a great commute for B, and waaaay more living space for all of us.
Ever since we signed the lease, and really, since we agree to put in our application (the day we saw it!!!) B and I go to bed talking about the house. We are both so excited for the life this house promises us. Now, we are cramped, dont have room for what we've got, and we got rid of a LOT! Its hard to have company, and we really dont very often. We are in a great playgroup and Ive never invited them here because theres just not room for the kids to have friends over, let alone their parents.
I dont like to keep things unnecessarily. Im not sure Ive always been like that, but I definitely havent kept extra stuff for close to 10 years. One night while B and I were dating, I was over at his house, while he still lived at home, and somehow ended up working with my mother in law until 2 in the morning cleaning out closets. throwing things away, and creating piles to be donated. Yet, while I would like to call myself a chronic purger, we still had a lot of extra in our house back in Texas.
Around my 27th birthday, we listed our house for sale. Our pretty 2000 square foot house. The lot we picked, across from a soon-to-be park that would surely prove useful with the family we thought we might raise there. The floor plan we picked. The fire place we moved according to the size of the tv B was going to get (which he got, and sold before moving back to LA) The house we built. Where our friends and family wrote and mailed in prayers that will stay in the house, but with us wherever we go. Funny anecdotes, stories and heartfelt wishes are written on the wooden boards holding up that house. Blessings over bread and wine written in the kitchen above the windows - part of what made us fall in love with the floorplan. We had 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a huuuuuuge yard, a lovely dining room and a kitchen that flowed and that I actually cooked in! We painted and decorated that house with friends. We filled the house with friends, family, love, parties, and STUFF. Its the stuff that drowns us.
The night we decided to list the house, the culmination of 4 years of trying to make Texas 'home', the stuff weighed us down. What will we do with all our stuff?!!? I didnt care. I wanted out. Out of the house we built, out of Texas and back HOME where I knew I fit. I have to say, after 4 years, I gave Texas a good shot. I can still appreciate the financial value of living there, but it was just never right, for me. I went through 4 jobs there, met some wonderful people, and some not so much. But in the end, I just couldnt swing it. I spent the first year going from nervous break down to nervous break down, spending countless nights on the computer looking up cheap one-way tickets for me and the cat to get the hell out of there. I even left the sites up sometimes so B could see how serious I was, or thought I was. Would I have really left him there? I dont know. . . I didnt in any event though. During this time, we saw several marriages fail the test of the strain of relocation. We missed family birthdays, dinners just because, hospital stays. . . we spent thousands rushing home for 'what if' hospital stays - all of which turned into nothing, thank goodness. We also made wonderful friends, and reconnected with old ones just by chance. We had the chance to define ourselves as 'us' without too much familial input - which as well meaning as it can be, has a limited space. We grew up, a little anyway. We saw places we never might have seen otherwise.
We made a decision and the real purging began. We sold and donated a lot of the stuff. Plenty of that ended up in storage because lucky us, our house sold very quickly! Some of the stuff came into our little apartment with us. I got pregnant, placed on bed rest, and more stuff accumulated. E and N were born, we went through hell with hospital stuff, and more house stuff accumulated. Finally, B got a job, at HOME! The question presented itself again. . .what do we do with all our stuff?!?!?! More selling, more donating, and a move back to LA. We spent a few weeks living at the inlaws and paying out the @$$ for animal boarding, and we found a place to put our stuff. . . our family too.
Finally, we are moving to a place that will fit us more appropriately, but we still have extra stuff. Its harder to get rid of it with kids around. Not that the attachment changes, but the time does. Its got to happen, and soon though. The new place, while it has great living space, does not have any extra storage. We thought we might have some of a one car garage, but that proved to not be the case. What do we do with the stuff?!?!!?!? We have a good amount set aside for donation, but there are still things we have been meaning to sell and havent, and other things we have been keeping 'just in case'. Not really an option anymore.
Im really glad to be getting rid of more of the extra. It satisfies my inner purger.
Im really just so excited to get the space back and have life in our house again. Im excited to use my new kitchen! Ive never been excited about cooking before. Ive fallen in love with my crockpot and I cant wait to rekindle things with my kitchen aid mixer!!! I havent used that in about 2 years and thats just sad really. I used my new hand chopped yesterday and my boys ate veggies without even knowing it!! I have that Jessica Seinfeld book, and maybe Ill use it! I did puree AL of their baby food anyway. One of the things Im most excited about is making challah. My husband and I befriended a Jewish family in Dallas, and the wife taught me how to make challah. Like, really make it. For a while, I made it pretty often. It was soooo good, and it was an event when we had fresh challah in the house. We even had Shabbat dinners, with guests!!! After all, we HAD to share the challah:)
I think for a long time I tried to not be excited about food. Its a strange thing. On the one hand, you're not 'supposed' to center your life around food, or constantly think about when you might eat again, or what you might eat. . . but, if you dont, then you might end up eating poorly, or too much, too soon or too late. Theres a happy medium I think we need to find, where we arent so focused on food that its all we can think about, but that we think about it enough that we take good care of our bodies. Like, responsible excitement?? I dont know. . . Im really tired. . . .
A couple months ago, the boys came down with colds and ear infections - horrible!! N had a lingering cough, so we had a lot of interrupted nights of sleep. He was clearly not feeing well, so one if not both of us, would get up with him. Sometimes E too. This is seemingly normal enough, but in my head, if it happens once, its the new normal. We had hardly any sleep for the first 10 months of the boys lives. We hallucinated - literally. Naps were my new addiction, and I didnt have nearly enough access to my drug. The night wakings have continued, and though I want to fight them, and re-sleep train him, now, the poor kid is teething. They are both teething, but it seems N has a harder time lately than E. To N's credit, Ive looked in his mouth, and hes getting molars in a baaaaad way. It looks like hes getting at least 3 of them, and his gums are puffy, swollen and one of them looks like it could pop at any second. I want to just pop it for him so he can move forward! (dont worry, Im tired, but not crazy, and I would never ever do that) Last night specifically, was a bad night. Though we went to bed early, at 930!! we were awakened 5 times by 3am. Once was spurred by our fire alarm! A bit of google research showed that it was likely caused by the cold temperature making the battery voltage low. The heater is on tonight. . .
Pardon the babble, I felt the need to catch up a bit with myself, and I am of course, exhausted.
Ever since we signed the lease, and really, since we agree to put in our application (the day we saw it!!!) B and I go to bed talking about the house. We are both so excited for the life this house promises us. Now, we are cramped, dont have room for what we've got, and we got rid of a LOT! Its hard to have company, and we really dont very often. We are in a great playgroup and Ive never invited them here because theres just not room for the kids to have friends over, let alone their parents.
I dont like to keep things unnecessarily. Im not sure Ive always been like that, but I definitely havent kept extra stuff for close to 10 years. One night while B and I were dating, I was over at his house, while he still lived at home, and somehow ended up working with my mother in law until 2 in the morning cleaning out closets. throwing things away, and creating piles to be donated. Yet, while I would like to call myself a chronic purger, we still had a lot of extra in our house back in Texas.
Around my 27th birthday, we listed our house for sale. Our pretty 2000 square foot house. The lot we picked, across from a soon-to-be park that would surely prove useful with the family we thought we might raise there. The floor plan we picked. The fire place we moved according to the size of the tv B was going to get (which he got, and sold before moving back to LA) The house we built. Where our friends and family wrote and mailed in prayers that will stay in the house, but with us wherever we go. Funny anecdotes, stories and heartfelt wishes are written on the wooden boards holding up that house. Blessings over bread and wine written in the kitchen above the windows - part of what made us fall in love with the floorplan. We had 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a huuuuuuge yard, a lovely dining room and a kitchen that flowed and that I actually cooked in! We painted and decorated that house with friends. We filled the house with friends, family, love, parties, and STUFF. Its the stuff that drowns us.
The night we decided to list the house, the culmination of 4 years of trying to make Texas 'home', the stuff weighed us down. What will we do with all our stuff?!!? I didnt care. I wanted out. Out of the house we built, out of Texas and back HOME where I knew I fit. I have to say, after 4 years, I gave Texas a good shot. I can still appreciate the financial value of living there, but it was just never right, for me. I went through 4 jobs there, met some wonderful people, and some not so much. But in the end, I just couldnt swing it. I spent the first year going from nervous break down to nervous break down, spending countless nights on the computer looking up cheap one-way tickets for me and the cat to get the hell out of there. I even left the sites up sometimes so B could see how serious I was, or thought I was. Would I have really left him there? I dont know. . . I didnt in any event though. During this time, we saw several marriages fail the test of the strain of relocation. We missed family birthdays, dinners just because, hospital stays. . . we spent thousands rushing home for 'what if' hospital stays - all of which turned into nothing, thank goodness. We also made wonderful friends, and reconnected with old ones just by chance. We had the chance to define ourselves as 'us' without too much familial input - which as well meaning as it can be, has a limited space. We grew up, a little anyway. We saw places we never might have seen otherwise.
We made a decision and the real purging began. We sold and donated a lot of the stuff. Plenty of that ended up in storage because lucky us, our house sold very quickly! Some of the stuff came into our little apartment with us. I got pregnant, placed on bed rest, and more stuff accumulated. E and N were born, we went through hell with hospital stuff, and more house stuff accumulated. Finally, B got a job, at HOME! The question presented itself again. . .what do we do with all our stuff?!?!?! More selling, more donating, and a move back to LA. We spent a few weeks living at the inlaws and paying out the @$$ for animal boarding, and we found a place to put our stuff. . . our family too.
Finally, we are moving to a place that will fit us more appropriately, but we still have extra stuff. Its harder to get rid of it with kids around. Not that the attachment changes, but the time does. Its got to happen, and soon though. The new place, while it has great living space, does not have any extra storage. We thought we might have some of a one car garage, but that proved to not be the case. What do we do with the stuff?!?!!?!? We have a good amount set aside for donation, but there are still things we have been meaning to sell and havent, and other things we have been keeping 'just in case'. Not really an option anymore.
Im really glad to be getting rid of more of the extra. It satisfies my inner purger.
Im really just so excited to get the space back and have life in our house again. Im excited to use my new kitchen! Ive never been excited about cooking before. Ive fallen in love with my crockpot and I cant wait to rekindle things with my kitchen aid mixer!!! I havent used that in about 2 years and thats just sad really. I used my new hand chopped yesterday and my boys ate veggies without even knowing it!! I have that Jessica Seinfeld book, and maybe Ill use it! I did puree AL of their baby food anyway. One of the things Im most excited about is making challah. My husband and I befriended a Jewish family in Dallas, and the wife taught me how to make challah. Like, really make it. For a while, I made it pretty often. It was soooo good, and it was an event when we had fresh challah in the house. We even had Shabbat dinners, with guests!!! After all, we HAD to share the challah:)
I think for a long time I tried to not be excited about food. Its a strange thing. On the one hand, you're not 'supposed' to center your life around food, or constantly think about when you might eat again, or what you might eat. . . but, if you dont, then you might end up eating poorly, or too much, too soon or too late. Theres a happy medium I think we need to find, where we arent so focused on food that its all we can think about, but that we think about it enough that we take good care of our bodies. Like, responsible excitement?? I dont know. . . Im really tired. . . .
A couple months ago, the boys came down with colds and ear infections - horrible!! N had a lingering cough, so we had a lot of interrupted nights of sleep. He was clearly not feeing well, so one if not both of us, would get up with him. Sometimes E too. This is seemingly normal enough, but in my head, if it happens once, its the new normal. We had hardly any sleep for the first 10 months of the boys lives. We hallucinated - literally. Naps were my new addiction, and I didnt have nearly enough access to my drug. The night wakings have continued, and though I want to fight them, and re-sleep train him, now, the poor kid is teething. They are both teething, but it seems N has a harder time lately than E. To N's credit, Ive looked in his mouth, and hes getting molars in a baaaaad way. It looks like hes getting at least 3 of them, and his gums are puffy, swollen and one of them looks like it could pop at any second. I want to just pop it for him so he can move forward! (dont worry, Im tired, but not crazy, and I would never ever do that) Last night specifically, was a bad night. Though we went to bed early, at 930!! we were awakened 5 times by 3am. Once was spurred by our fire alarm! A bit of google research showed that it was likely caused by the cold temperature making the battery voltage low. The heater is on tonight. . .
Pardon the babble, I felt the need to catch up a bit with myself, and I am of course, exhausted.
Crockpot Chicken Taco Stew
My friend forwarded me this one, and Im planning to make tomorrow when my mom and sister will be over helping us PACK!
http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=280479
notes to come
http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=280479
notes to come
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