Babywearing:
As Ive shared multiple times, I was horrified of my kids when they were babies. Whether or not that fear was valid, thats up for more discussion, lol, but seriously, I was horrified. From a very early time though, I wanted and really needed them to be somewhat independent. I didnt want my kids to need to be with me at all times, or need to be held in order to sleep or settle. I wanted my body back and some freedom - remember, 15 weeks of bed rest because my body wasnt mine, but was a baby baker. However, things as always, did not go as planned. I still feel to this day that E was traumatized during his second hospital stay. Im sure the care was good and all, but he had spent 28 days in the hospital, came home for 2 weeks and then was back for a few days with his reflux. He was taken away, again. The beginning weeks and months of a childs life are vital for their attachment to family, mommy and daddy. . . and he had to go back to the hospital. He came home and we had to re-learn how to feed him. We had to give him prevacid 3 times a day. He screamed, a lot. Especially during the first weeks while the medicine kicked in and started to heal him to he could feel better. Through my own exhaustion and hormones, it was hard to see past my own discomfort. I was still afraid of creating this dependent creature, and I failed to see that he and N were born dependent creatures. That it wasnt the time to teach independence. . . yet. While N was ok to be left in the crib or pack n play with a toy or musical toy going, E just wasnt there yet. N hadnt been taken from his home though, his NICU issues were far less severe than E's.
So, what might I have done differently? I would have worn E all the time! Baby wearing is the use of a baby bjorn type thing. There are a million on the market, and its important to find what is comfortable for you and baby at the same time. There is one on the market called the baby ergo:
http://www.ergobabycarrier.com/
I wish I had gotten that one. Everyone I know who has it looooves it. Im not sure what the weight limit is, but I understand you can use it for quite some time. I think E would have benefitted from being close more, earlier. I gave in at one point and bought a maya wrap, but I wasnt as happy with it and didnt use it as often as Id have liked. I tihnk I might have if it was more comfortable. Part of the issue too was that the ergo cost $100+. But. . . I probably could have found on on craigslist and washed it. . . . whatever. . . hindsight is 20/20, and I promise you, and the dr. agrees, both E and N are perfectly happy, well adjusted, developing on target little men:)
Its just a PHASE!
Often I have said I wish someone told me that. . bla bla bla. But I cant say this here. We've all heard that 'oh, its just a phase'. Babies do that, and it changes, etc. . nothing is forever. Im not sure how I could have hard wired this into my brain, especially since Im still working on that part. But nothing is forever, as soon as you get one thing down, another changes. Its all fluid. A LOT of trial and error. I havent figured out a way around that part yet, but will share if I do. I had a hard time with the sleep thing, and the routine thing. Every time we had a piece of the sleep issues down, or a new part of the routine that I felt worked. . . anything that threatened anything I had down pat was to be squashed. Eventually though. . . they go to sleep, mama gets her shower, and even gets to sleep. . . through the night:) It might take a while, but it DOES happen. I was so hung up on not losing any part of what I had created that I refused help and made up excuses a lot. Maybe it was the hormones?
Again though, I have to say. . . . my boys are happy, healthy, and currently as I type? Playing in their cribs before nap time:)
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